Put your head on my shoulder
by Kitty in the Box
Summary: Diana and Berkeley are best of friends. Diana is about to take a major step in changing her life and will Berkeley still be there or will they finally let go of the friendship? Please read and review.


**PUT YOUR HEAD ON MY SHOULDER**

**Disclaimer: FAKE is owned by Sanami Matoh. Title of the story is directly inspired by the song with the same title written by Paul Anka as performed by Michael Buble. I hope you enjoy reading this story. It has been years I've been absent from the fanfic scene and it's nice to be back once in awhile.**

"I see congratulations are in order." Berkeley gave her a sly smile after looking at the engagement ring on Diana's finger as she tries to read his face for approval. He nods and puts on his coat. Grabbed his keys as he and Diana walked out of his office.

"Oh thank you Berks! Always the charmer." She kisses him on the cheek and giggled as she latched onto his arm.

"Let's have dinner. We should celebrate this catastrophe!" Berkeley laughed.

"Oh Berky! Where for art thou takest me?" Diana laughed and playfully punched him on the arm.

"There's this lovely restaurant we should check out. They say the menu is divine and the wine is exquisite."

"Oh do tell. I'm salivating with curiosity here. Besides, I'm hungry anyway. The flight from Ontario was boring but it would be more boring being stuck in a hotel while I'm here."

"What were you doing in Ontario?"

"Oh we conducted a weapons and ammunitions seminar there."

"I see."

"Hey! Aren't we going to take the car?"

"No. It's just walking distance from the station. It would be nice to walk. You don't mind, do you?"

"Not at all. I feel perfectly safe walking in the streets of New York with a heartbreaker like you beside me." She held onto his arm and leaned on his shoulder. Berkeley chuckled in response. They always shared this flirty banter for as long as they've known each other. There is a chill in the air.

They have arrived the restaurant and were greeted by a staff at the door. They deposited their coats at the coat counter.

"Will that be smoking or nonsmoking area?" The tall attendant smiled at them.

"Smoking." Berkeley answered.

"This way please, sir, madam."

They were escorted to their table. Diana observed the atmosphere. It was cozy. They had a nice view of the dance area. A soft piano piece is playing. A band was performing classic ballads. It held a very romantic yet sentimental feel to everything. Diana could not help but smile contentedly.

"I love this place, Berky. You've outdone yourself again. You never cease to surprise me. You've always had such great taste." She took out a cigarette he offered and he lighted it for her.

He smiled and put his cigarette to his lips and gestured for the waiter. The waiter came by and took their orders.

"These are excellent choices. Your dinner will be served in 20 minutes."

"Thank you." Diana winked at the waiter.

"So tell me...whatever possessed the wild girl Diana to finally settle down. I hope this man of yours is perfectly aware of all your quirks."

"Oh Berky. You make sound so evil. He's a sweet man if I must tell you. And he's a doctor." Diana smiled smugly at him.

"Psychiatrist?"

"Oh no! no! no! A gynecologist. I hate dating psychiatrists. They seem to think that they can just easily figure you out."

"Is that the same gynecologist you introduced to me last time?"

"Oh that was Gene. We broke up already. This one's a Dr. Freddy Mantegna."

"Just like the actor."

"Yeah, he gets that a lot but no relation."

"Tell me more about this doctor of yours. How did you two meet? I presume you've been thoroughly examined by him." Berkeley chuckled.

"Oh you naughty boy." Diana giggled. "Of course he has. I met him at a party. He's tall like you. Blonde hair. No glasses though. But he sports a mustache. He's clean. Never been arrested. I checked his file. Hehe! He was actually dating Laura Gibbs, an agent from the BAU. He was nice but obviously misplaced in a crowd of FBI field agents. Apparently Laura was not doing a fantastic job of keeping him company. I found him nursing his drink at the bar counter. I struck a conversation with him and we ended up really enjoying ourselves. He was witty and surprisingly funny. But he has that quiet demeanor about him. One thing lead to another and as they say, the rest is history."

"Sounds like you were on the prowl. What did Laura say?"

"Oh I only found out later that they were already on the verge of breaking up. He called me the next day after the party."

Berkeley tapped his cigarette on the ashtray. He remains focused on Diana as she chatted about work and the last case they solved. The conversation has progressed from travel to her newfound interest with monster trucks. Diana always had that adrenaline rush within her. Her interest in men were mostly those who matched her drive for adventure. So it surprised him that she suddenly would settle with someone who was her total opposite.

Their food finally arrived and much to their pleasure it looked really inviting and delicious.

"I want to know more about this man of yours Deedee. What's he like? Does he like monster trucks too?" Berkeley was slicing his steak.

"Oh he would never go to a monster truck show with me. Poor thing. But I think I can wrestle him into watching it with me sometime. He's never been to one and I intend to change all that. He's a really sweet man, Berky. He has his own private practice. He was divorced five years ago. No kids. Although I think he'd be perfect with them. I've seen the way he bonds with his sister's kids. They simply adore him." Diana's eyes shifted and she turned quiet and took a sip of her champagne. She looked like she was caught up in a deep thought.

It was clear enough for Berkeley the change in her mood. For a moment she was miles away. He sensed a certain hesitation in her but quickly dismissed it. No need to worry about such things now. It is a lovely evening and everything should work out perfectly, he thought.

"So you've met his family."

"Yeah, we went to Vermont last week so he could introduce me to his folks. They're nice people. His parents have been married for 45 years. His sister, Moira, loves to talk though and she's funny. She's three years older than him and I sense the closeness. They're wonderful."

"Have you decided on the wedding date yet?"

"Yeah. Sometime in late August, I think. We'll set the wedding in Vermont. His family are more than happy to take care of the details. I was thinking Vegas. You know me, I'm not too big on weddings. The wedding dress is going to be my area of choice. Funny. Stuff like this usually requires a mom present, right?"

"Deedee..." Berkeley squeezed her hand. Diana never had a happy home life. The only family she had was her younger brother, Frank who died in a car accident ten years ago. Her parents split up when she was 8 years old and Frank was only four and had been in foster care until she turned eighteen and officially adopted her brother. She was always headstrong and fiercely independent. But her whole world crashed when she lost Frank. She had never been the same. She could not keep longterm relationships. Their friendship and her work at the Bureau were the only real things that kept her sanity intact.

"It would be nice, you know. I thought, hey...I'm not getting any younger. I'm 40 years old now. It's about time I settled down and end my rock and roll lifestyle. Having kids one day would be good too. Frank would have made a good uncle. He would have liked Freddy too. They probably would hit it off quite well."

"I'm sure Frank would be very happy for you, Deedee."

"You think so? Yeah, you know I still visit his grave every month with no fail. I told him about Freddy. As usual he lets me do the talking as he listens. I am missing my baby brother right now, Berky. Shit." She impatiently wiped the tears in her eyes. "This fucking kills me, man. I must be really getting old to get all caught up like this."

"We're all getting old, Deedee. But you still look gorgeous as ever. You are stronger than you realize."

"Thanks, honey. You always know what to say. Is my makeup still good?" She carefully dabbed her cheeks with a napkin.

"Of course it is. Come on, hot stuff. Why don't I cheer you up and let's hit the dance floor, shall we?" He stood up and assisted her off the chair and held her hand as they approached the dance floor. About five other couples were dancing and they chose a spot that was near to the stage. He slid his arm around her waist and pulled her close as his other hand clasped on hers. Her hand held onto his arm and she rested her head on his shoulder as they swayed to the music on the dance floor.

"Feeling better?" Berkeley whispered to her ear.

"It always feels good dancing with you, Berky." She nodded. He is wearing his favorite aftershave, she observed. He always smell so good and comfortingly masculine and warm.

"My pleasure." He planted a small kiss on her hair. Diana's soft hair with the scent of fresh jasmine and chamomile. Her two most favorite scents in the world and he always knew that.

The two close friends glided and swayed on the dance floor as the music played. Berkeley closed his eyes as his mind wandered back that it is the same song being played at Senior prom. It seemed funny that he would be reminded of such a memory from a distant past. Yet there is something quite familiar with everything now. Just like this. The same song. The same girl in his arms. The same feeling overwhelming them both. It was that time they decided, this was to become their song for each other.

_Put your head on my shoulder_

_Hold me in your arms baby_

_Squeeze me oh so tight, show me_

_That you love me too_

"Oh my God...Berky, they're playing our song."

"Yeah, wouldn't you know?"

She looked up to him and they both chuckled. He held her closer to him. Yes, our song, he agreed. It was the same song that was played on their senior prom and on a whim, they decided it was going to be their song. It was a beautiful evening that time. They only wanted to dance with each other refusing all other offers from their schoolmates. Will they be ever to dance this way again? Will they hold each other close like this again? So much time has gone by. Things will never be the same way again. He was so young then. So confused. So afraid that if things changed, he would be alone again.

Diana held onto Berkeley like she never wanted to let go. Blame the music. Blame the mood. One day soon, they won't be able to spend such a time like this. This beautiful evening. This dance. An overwhelming sense of nostalgic sentimentality flooded her. She was so young then. So madly in love. A love that was better left unsaid.

_Put your lips next to mine dear_

_Won't you kiss me once, baby_

_Just a kiss goodnight, maybe_

_You and I will fall in love_

_Some people say that love's a game_

_A game you just can't win_

_If there's a way I'll find it someday_

And then this fool will rush in

It wasn't long unstoppable tears began to flow on Diana's cheeks. She tried to bury her face on his shoulder. Their hands clasped tight to each other. A sudden embarrassment that the other couples on the dance floor would see her. She tried to wipe her eyes. Breathing deeply to hide the sniffles. She was making a complete fool of herself now, she just knew it. Why did they have to play that damn song of all things? Why now? Why this moment? I'm supposed to be happy, damn it! Damn it!

_Put your head on my shoulder_

_Whisper in my ear, baby_

_Words I long to hear, tell me_

_Tell me that you love me too_

"Deedee...are you okay?" Berkeley whispered. He felt her body shaking in his arms. He felt her head pressed strongly on his shoulder but she would not look at him. It worried him. If he could only see her face. If he could see her eyes. If there is anything that he could say to calm her heart. If only he could find the words. But would they still matter? For the second time around, he is afraid to find out. He can only hold her like this and hope that the evening would not end so miserably.

"I'm sorry. I really need to go." She suddenly broke away from him and hurriedly walked out of the restaurant. For Diana, she felt that the longer she stayed, her heart would surely break. She could not take any of it. Too much past memories drowning her. There was no turning back. No more daydreams. No more fantasies. No more wishful thinking. She has to face reality that you can never get what you hope for. There is still a chance to be happy somehow. It was time to wake up from the dream. But what she feared the most was that if she had stayed any longer, she would not be able to let go.

"What the?" Berkeley tried to keep his stance on the dance floor. He hadn't expected Diana taking off so abruptly. He rushed past the other dancers and tables. She was fast. He waved for the waiter to get the bill. The waiter returned with his credit card and receipt. Berkeley grabbed his card and walked out of the restaurant. His anxiety was rising. Where the hell could she have gone? They didn't have a car coming to the restaurant. He looked on both sides of the street and there was no sign of her. Damn it! She was always such a fast walker and by the looks of it, she was in great hurry to leave him right there. Instinct told him that despite that, she would have not gone so far yet. He took another quick glance on both sides of the street and decided to cross the street ahead. He walked fast and bumping into the crowd until he noticed the unmistakable blonde tresses cascading just a few feet away from him. Diana took a quick left turn and that is when Berkeley called out to her.

"DIANA!"

She was already hailing for a cab when he finally caught up with her.

"Diana, wait....talk to me! What's going on?" Berkeley was visibly annoyed and worried at the same time.

"It's nothing, Berkeley. Nothing at all. Look I'm really sorry for leaving like that. But I really need to go, okay?"

"It's NOT nothing, Diana. You always say that when you're in trouble. Talk to me please." He held her hand making her face him. But she tries hard to evade his stare. She could feel the pressure of his fingers and she knew that he was not letting her go anywhere. But how could she tell him how she truly felt? What difference would it make now? Why was she acting so stupidly? What was she expecting to happen? She was beginning to regret for showing up at his office and then maybe none of these weird feelings would surface.

"Let me go, Berkeley!" She pleaded only this time her voice sounded like it was going to break in sheer frustration. Her other hand still waving for a cab.

"I am not letting you go until you tell me what's wrong." Berkeley's voice was snapped. His frustration was mounting by the second.

A cab stopped by them and just as she opened the car door, Berkeley pulled her back away from the car and told the driver to just drive away.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT FOR?" She was aghast. She pulled away from Berkeley's grip on her then quickly walked ahead of him as he followed behind.

"DIANA, STOP THIS. I SAID STOP THIS!" He walks quickly enough to go in front of her and this time held her more firmly on the shoulders.

_Some people say that love's a game_

_A game you just can't win_

_If there's a way I'll find it someday_

_And then this fool will rush in_

The pained look on her face broke his heart. Tears streaming down her flushed cheeks. Her mascara running. Her lips pursed and quivering. Her eyes reddened with tears. Oh Deedee...She backed away onto a wall and covered her face. She cried that it hurt so much to hear. He felt frozen and useless as he watched her.

Momentarily, he found the strength to approach her as he gently took her hands away from her face. They stood face to face and he swallowed. So much beauty. So much pain. A sad smile escaped his lips as he wiped her tears with his thumb. He pulled her to him and they held each other tightly. Berkeley felt sudden tears flow from his eyes. Oh God, he really was going to lose her soon. It just dawned to him that it was now or never. He could not admit how betrayed he felt when she announced of her engagement but he pretended that it was a good thing for her and took her out for dinner. But looking at her now with tears in her eyes, he felt a tug in his heart and knew right there, she too was feeling bothered by it. Both of them too stubborn to admit to each other and to themselves.

"I was supposed to ask you to be my best man at my wedding since I don't really have a dependable girlfriend to be my maid of honor. Funny. I never stopped feeling this way, Berky. I'm so sorry. I know I'm supposed to be happy now. I know I should be and I sure as hell know I deserve it. But I can't and it's killing me. I swore I would never feel this way again. Ever."

"Deedee...I know. Me too. I didn't expect any of this would happen again. I closed it off for a long time. Afraid that things would change. Afraid that I would lose the one thing that truly made me happy. Who always accepted me for who I was and I am now."

"We were so young then, Berky. What did we know?"

"I guess not enough to realize what idiots we were, keeping away what we truly felt from each other and maybe we could have saved each other a lot of pain now."

"But he's a sweet man, Berks. We're getting really soon." She looked away when she said it. She knew it sounded desperate but she wanted to do the right thing.

"Are you telling me or yourself?" Berkeley's voice was curt.

No answer came. Diana could not find the words. She wondered if it was really enough. Freddy is everything she could have in a family that was denied from her all those years of hardship and grief. But where did her true happiness always belonged? Whose comfort did she always seek? What keeps her coming back for more? Hope against hope. To contend herself with playful words and occasional embraces. Nothing more. She didn't want to expect so much. She feared the consequences of losing more than she already had to live with.

She felt the strong arms that held her tightly slowly ease and hands feeling her face. Her heart skipped as she noticed his tear-stricken face. She ached to wipe the tears away.

"Deedee...? Am I too late?"

Diana broke into tears again. She grasped at his coat and pressed her body against him. Their lips crushed on each other as a tidal wave of emotions they have desperately tried to hide from each other all those years swept over them. The cold fear they once held was melting away and all they felt was the heat of overwhelming release and rapture. They clung to each other possessively as the kiss deepened with wanton need and longing.

"You were always the one, Berkeley. I was so scared about being more than friends because we knew each other too well. But you feel so good to me." She breathed as they released each other for air. It was true. It was sheer torture for her to prevent her emotions slip whenever they were together. Oh how she loved him even then and so much more now. She never stopped loving him. She has had lovers in the past but none of them worked out and none of them even came close. Berkeley is the only one she felt truly at home again. His kind words. His handsome and warm presence. His intoxicating scent. His relentless support through the troubled years in her life. His strong arms that held her through her loss. The only one who really saw her through the pain and celebrated joys. They complemented each other so well, it was simply unmistakable there was more than mere friendship between them. They were bound to each other and yet denied themselves of each other's innermost desires.

"Oh God, Diana...you are the only woman I ever wanted. I was so afraid that if I told you how I truly felt that we would have ruined our friendship and I didn't want to lose you like that." Berkeley held her face closely to his that their foreheads touched and he kissed her nose.

"You could have told me." She replied.

"Well, you could have told me too. But it looks like I wasn't too late after all." He smiled.

"No, not at all. Your timing's....just right."

He lifted her chin and kissed her more passionately. Yes, there had been countless scenarios he pictured in his mind but none of them comes close to the immense happiness he is feeling this very moment. This beautiful woman. The only woman he desired so desperately enough it drove him crazy with frustration. His anchor and whose strength he deeply admired. His closest ally yet who was unfazed to point out his faults. His one true friend who stood by him and believed in him. The real love of his life.

They walked side by side along the street. Berkeley's arms encircled around her waist and her arm slid on his back as she leans closely to the warmth of his chest.

_Put your head on my shoulder_

_Whisper in my ear, baby_

_Words I want to hear, tell me_

_Put your head on my shoulder_


End file.
